Boy, last night was crazy.
One of my students, Bomi, asked me the other day what is one of my bad habits. I should really call her right now and update my answer.
One of my worst habits is procrastination. For some crazy reason I didn’t even get started on finding recipes for dishes to take to Christmas until about 5pm yesterday evening. The same thing happens every time – when I finally started researching, I got really excited and ended up with a list of 5 different dishes that I wanted to make.
Needless to say I had a hay-day in the kitchen until the early hours of the morning.
There was a lot of this.
And by 2 am my kitchen looked like this.
And I had done some cleaning up at that point! Scary.
Honestly, I had so much fun – the husband and I downloaded some new upbeat Christmas songs, and I was jamming away while my garlic bread rose and little gingerbread men came to life (dishes and recipes coming soon!). The only way it could have been any better is if it had been 2 pm instead of 2 am. But you can’t win ‘em all, right?
I finally stumbled into bed at about 3 am, and mere seconds after my head hit my pillow, I knew I was in for a rough time. I just could not fall asleep! I was so wired up and my mind was racing with everything I needed to do still and with thoughts about the future. I get real deep when I’m delirious.
I tossed and turned all night long, not really falling asleep at all until about 5:30 am and then waking up again at 7. Finally at 7:30 I hit the point where there was no going back to sleep. It was all over.
So, I laid there in bed and again my mind started racing. The lack of sleep was hindering any chance I had at rational thinking, and I started fretting over things that are going on in my life right now. I began to analyze everything, creating “what if” scenarios in my head and then scolding myself for letting my mind run wild.
It was then that I turned to the one person I know is always there. I started praying. I started praying for joy. I asked God to give me a peace in my heart because He is in control of my past, my present and my future. He has a specific plan for me and He will work out that plan, regardless of how much I try to interfere and make it my own. I asked him to embed that truth in my heart and to help me live by it every second of the day. To help me give up my plans and my anxieties and hand it all over to him. And just trust.
And suddenly, my heart was filled with relief. It was as if I had taken a peacefulness pill, and the medicine was slowly spreading throughout my body reaching from the crown of my head all the way down to my toes.
And I felt His peace. And His joy.
And then I felt the husband’s steady breath on my shoulder. And I felt Olive’s warm and furry little body curled up on my other side. And I felt the coziness of my warm house and my bed.
And I was filled with thankfulness.
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
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