bullet points
I’m not even going to begin welcoming myself back and making excuses for the months that I’ve been MIA. It sounds like much more fun to just cut to the chase….bullet point style. There have been many things going on over the last couple of months – some more welcome in my life than others.
- We took a mini trip to Dallas and bought new living room furniture! Buying a new couch was way overdue, and we finally just went for it. We got a really great sectional that fits our living room perfectly and seats so many more people plus a dining set. We are loving it them!
- I started a new job. Teaching. If you’ve been reading CSM for more than a year, you know that the path I’ve walked with teaching has been rather…bumpy. There have been many highs and lows and unexpected twists…so it should have come as no surprise when yet another crazy change landed in my lap. Backing up a bit…last May I started teaching international students at a language school in our new city. I absolutely loved it. You guys know that international students are where my heart is, and I was seriously thriving. And then I got a text from my best friend and former teaching co-worker. And it changed everything. One day I was just fine, and 24 hours later I was making the decision to quit my job and go back to my old school as a sophomore English II and PreAP English teacher. It was a combination of being flattered, being offered a brand new classroom with great technology and a window, being lured back by my teacher friends and not wanting to say no to the money. I was never completely sure those were great reasons to go back, but for some reason it just seemed right. Now, almost halfway through the fall semester, I can honestly say it was the right decision. I LOVE my kids. I never knew I could enjoy students so incredibly much. To be blunt, I think I just really had a bad batch for my first year of teaching. But this time I’ve been blessed with some really awesome students. It has still been stressful. And I wanted to kill myself over 170 essays last month, but I truly feel like it’s worth it.
- We’ve started the IVF process. Obviously, we are still wandering through the injustices of infertility, seeing as how you have yet to see a CSM baby announcement. Last month, after trying multiple other strategies, my doctor recommended that we start this process. We’re a little over 2 weeks in, and honestly, it’s making me crazy. I’m currently on birth control to regulate my body, and later this week I’ll start my first round of injections. I’m not looking forward to it, but I’m just doing my best to stay positive. I’ve been dealing with so many issues and feelings over the last couple of weeks – fear, hope, anxiety, excitement, impatience, thankfulness, anger, hormonal mood swings, constant headaches, numbness – just to name a few. It’s not getting any easier, and I’m not sure it will until this is over and we know the outcome. There’s so much more that could be – needs to be – said on this…but another time.
- We took at trip to the state fair! Enough said.
- We went to Washington D.C. Last year I tagged along with Jon on his work conference trip to D.C. And I completely fell in love! After accepting my new job, I wasn’t sure I was going to get to go again this year, but we made it happen. It was just as great as I remembered. Because we did so much sightseeing last year, we enjoyed a few less sights and a little more relaxing this year. We added on a couple of extra days to the front of the trip as a sort of vacation…and then I flew solo the other days. It was much needed time away.
it rained almost the entire time, and it was freezing!
I’ve missed blogging. I truly have. In the midst of the emotional highs and lows of the last couple of months, I oftentimes find myself retreating a little bit. I find myself saying that I really just want to crawl into a whole and hide until all this is over, and at times I feel like I have no energy left for relationships or the things I love in life. I know these feelings are only temporary – a result of medication and just a stressful phase of life, but it’s not a good place to be. So, tonight I’m stepping out. For the first time in a while, I’m not allowing myself to be defeated.. Tonight is all I can commit myself to right now. But right now it’s all I need. Tomorrow will be another day.
